I'm Thankful

This week, I’ll be celebrating Thanksgiving from China.  And living in China makes you thankful for all kinds of things that you tend to take for granted as an American.

I'm so thankful to be an American.

I just got done doing some shopping for the mini-Thanksgiving feast that some of the village Americans will be having. (Thanks mom & dad for mailing me some stove-top stuffing and a few packs of gravy!) It’s looking like we are going to have chicken instead of turkey, but hey, when in China... So anyways, while I was shopping, I was thinking about all the things that I have to be thankful for, and I thought I’d share that with you.

I’m thankful…

for my family and friends and dogs.

for western toilets.

for the ability to flush toilet paper.

for food without bones in it.

for variety.

for the opportunity to choose my major in college.

for the freedom to speak my mind.

for the opportunity to live in China. 

for the freedom to attend Church.

for Starbucks.

for the ability to drink water out of the tap without boiling it.

for showers with water pressure.

for the ability to freely access Facebook, YouTube, etc.

for comfortable mattresses.

for traffic laws that are enforced.

for American food.

for the completely awesome experiences I've had this year.

for the ability to afford to eat at a restaurant and own more than two outfits.

Yeah, it can be easy to bash America… because society as a whole is pretty much insane (think “Honey Boo Boo and Jersey Shore”)… But for as many things as we are doing wrong, there are a lot of things that we are doing right.

We are so freaking blessed to be born in America.

So celebrate.

Love.
Laugh.

Post a message on Facebook.

Watch a video on YouTube.
Praise Jesus. 

Take a nap in your bed that has a comfortable mattress.
Flush your toilet paper.
Be thankful.

Trick or Treat?

Halloween basically doesn't exist in China. Most adults have never heard of it. Only about half of my students knew what it was before this week. The only people in the village who know about and celebrate Halloween are the few American foreigners (there's three of us) and the very young students that attend one of the private English schools in town. And I'm pretty sure they are just enjoying people giving them candy.

In true form, we decided to celebrate Halloween anyways. As luck would have it, the infamous 0513 nightclub was having a "Halloween Party". Translation – maybe a few decorations, special outfits for the employees, but pretty much business as usual.

Except for the foreigners.

I've blogged about being stared at like a celebrity. On a normal day in normal clothes. But it's just not Halloween without a costume.

As luck would have it, a friend brought me a "Sexy Nurse" costume from the States.  (And believe me, the irony that she brought the costume all the way from the USA when it was probably made less than an hour from here is not lost on me.)

So there I was strolling through the village in a nurse costume…  I had a stethoscope, working "syringes" for shots of booze, a cute little nurse hat, and a significant amount of cleavage showing. I must note that this costume would not be considered the least bit scandalous in the USA, but here I was accosted by more than the normal amount of paparazzi.

The point is… we were the only people dressed up. And the commotion we generated was even more amusing than usual.

I think that we have quite a few new fans of Halloween. I'm pretty sure I convinced at least 10 people to dress up next year. As ridiculous as it sounds, our costumes were the starting point for some really interesting conversations. There's nothing like promoting cross-cultural understanding through dressing up like a nurse, sexy zebra, and Sock Monkey.

20 Questions

Kids are hilarious. Not always intentionally, but entertaining none the less. I wish I could remember half the things that some of my students have said to make me laugh. I really need to start writing things down as they happen.

 

This week was a particularly funny week. We were working on asking questions – I decided to play 20 questions with my classes.

 

Here are a few of the best quotes from class this week that I can remember:

 

Is it a superstar? Yes. Is it a woman? Yes. Justin Bieber.

 

Is it an animal? Yes. Can you eat it? No. Can it eat you?

 

Is it an animal? Yes. Is it black? Yes. Obama!!

 

Is it a sport? Yes.  Fuck!  Kid from across the room, "That's not a sport."

           

Is it a person? Yes. Is he sexy? Yes. Kobe Bryant? Yes!! Kid from across the room, "He is not sexy. I am much more sexy than he."

The Mystery of the Long Fingernail

Hi my name is Julie and I used to blog here often. Sorry I've been MIA lately, but nothing worth blogging about has happened. It's life as usual in the village. So instead of a story about something crazy that has happened to me, today I will attempt to answer the age old question, "Why do many Chinese men have one really long pinkie fingernail?"

 

Okay, so I really have no idea, but it is perplexing.

 

Thus, I've done a bit of research via the Internet and person to person interviews and come up with a list of several plausible theories. These theories come from both foreigners and local Chinese. Everyone agrees that the phenomena exists, but nobody really knows why. The evidence was pretty inconclusive.

 

1.    Home-grown cocaine scoop

2.    Booger/ ear-wax scoop

3.    Good luck

4.    Status symbol. In the olden days, long fingernails were a sign of wealth. If you're laboring away in the fields all day, you probably don't have long unbroken fingernails.

 

Personally, I'm thinking it's a good mix of all of the above. If you have any insight, I'd greatly appreciate the feedback.

I Stole Sugarcane Today

Unlicensed food stalls and street vendors are illegal in China.

 

So how do you know which ones are licensed and which ones aren't?

 

Easy. You wait until the police come by. The ones that scatter are unlicensed, and the ones that stay either have a license or aren't worried about being checked. You tend to see people scatter more often in bigger cities but every so often it happens here in the village.

 

Today, on my daily stroll through town, I stopped to buy some sugarcane from a guy with a wheelbarrow full of it. Business was good for him and he was peeling and slicing sugarcane left and right. There were probably about four people waiting when I was there.

 

Just as the man handed me my bag and I was about to hand him my 5 kwai, the police came around the corner and homeboy grabbed his wheelbarrow and took off down the alley at warp speed. Sugarcane was flying everywhere, children were diving out of the way, dogs were barking – it was ridiculous. This dude must have been caught without a license before; usually the escape is not quite so dramatic.

 

So there I stood with my bag of sugarcane that I did not pay for.

 

I felt really bad so I wandered around the area for about 15 minutes to see if the guy would come back, but he never did. I'll have to be on the lookout for him in the future so I can pay him back for my stolen sugarcane.

The Countryside

Today was the first day back from vacation, so I thought that I'd ask the kids what they did during their holiday.

 

"I went to the countryside" – was the overwhelming response. Even most of the adults I asked said they did this.

 

But what exactly happens in the countryside? I HAVE NO IDEA. I literally could not get anyone to expand on what going to the countryside means.

 

Do you visit your family there? Is there some sort of resort or orchard? Are there just thousands of Chinese people standing around in an enormous field? What happens in this mysterious "countryside"?

 

Nobody could tell me. Or maybe nobody was allowed to tell me.

 

The only conclusion I can make is that it is clearly a secret. Foreigners must never learn what happens there.

A Foreigners Guide To Living in China.

I was asked to write an article about living in China by my school for a country wide competition… Here's my submission:

 

China is an amazing place. It is without a doubt one of the coolest, most interesting, and historically fascinating countries on earth. I could go on and on with the superlatives, but I'll leave it up to you to come up with your own way of describing China – everyone's experience is different.

 

That being said, life in China is markedly different from life in the USA. Everyday things like going to the supermarket, eating dinner, and paying for your cell phone can become totally incomprehensible and overwhelming if you don't know what to expect.

 

Here are a few helpful tips that will ease your transition into life here.

 

You will be a celebrity – embrace it. If you resemble anything but a native Chinese person, get ready to stand out. If you happen to be blonde haired and blue eyed like myself the difference is even more evident.

 

Everyone will acknowledge you wherever you go. Children will point and laugh. Grown men will say "Hello!" and then run away giggling when you say hello back. People will be curious as to what you are ordering for dinner or buying at the supermarket. They will stare. I love it, but it's been known to annoy some.

 

People will also take your picture. This may be done blatantly or discretely depending on the personality of the photographer. The brave people will ask for a photo with you! I've posed for family portraits and been asked to hold babies and pets. What people are doing with these pictures I have yet to discover. If you find out, let me know.

 

You will know you have gotten used to your fame and to life in China when you begin to stare at the foreign tourists just as much as the locals do.

 

Forget everything you know about Chinese food. Real Chinese food is even better than you can imagine. Real Chinese food varies from city to city, but it is always delicious. As a foreigner, you won't recognize 95% of the things you eat, but don't let that stop you from shoveling it in as fast as your chopsticks can go. Chinese chefs can turn simple things like cucumbers, tomatoes, and eggs into a delicious meal. And eating out is much cheaper and easier than attempting to cook for yourself. Come ready to eat.

 

Make Chinese friends. Chinese friends are the best. Seriously. They are kind, loyal, and amazingly helpful. They will keep you from making any serious cultural faux pas and help you learn about real Chinese culture. My favorite memories of China so far are of chilling with my amazing new friends.

 

It's also nice to have someone that won't get offended and will only laugh at you a little bit when you ask about something strange or obvious.

 

Come prepared to travel. China is a massive country with a million awesome things to see. There's no better way to get to know the locals than by bonding on an eighteen-hour train ride. Each province has it's own unique food, fascinating history, and wonderful people to discover.

 

I've climbed the Great Wall and hiked through the Stone Forest. I've eaten fried scorpions in Beijing and Hot Pot in Chengdu. I've seen the Impressions West Lake performance and the Sichuan Opera. I've visited thousand year old water villages. I've cuddled a Giant Panda. I've met wonderful people and made great friends in each city I visited.

 

You could spend a year traveling from place to place and still not be able to experience all that China has to offer.

 

Enjoy every second of your time here. It's impossible to summarize China in any neat way – it's so enormous and diverse and your experiences will vary from day to day and city to city. I'll sum it up by saying – If you are thinking about coming to China; do it! You won't regret it for a second.

I Freaking Love China!

I was going to have a quiet Monday evening. So how did I end up in 0513, the only nightclub in the village, being forced to chug beer as hundreds of people belt out the Chinese national anthem?

 

Excellent question. Things really escalated quickly.

 

What started out as a leisurely stroll around the village with my friend Sky turned into a rowdy National Day celebration at 0513… There are really no words that can accurately depict the events of that fateful eve.

 

It still seems quite surreal.

 

I cooked myself dinner. I went for a walk with Sky. We bought some pomegranates. We stopped to eat our pomegranates and watch one of the best firework displays I've ever seen. We got dragged to the club by a stampede of celebrants wanting to hang with the laowai.

 

I enter the nightclub via the usual red carpet. At the end of the red carpet is a HUGE photo of Chairman Mao that you must cross to get in. Every inch of the club is covered with a Chinese flag or a poster declaring, "The Diaoyu Islands belong to China!" The employees are sporting China owns the Diaoyu Islands shirts.

 

There was a lull in the chaos as we settled into the club. I played dice games with some friends. I danced to Flo Rida. I sipped a beer.

 

The lights go out. Three club girls march out in slutty military uniforms and proceed to do a provocative dance to the Chinese national anthem. The crowd starts getting pumped. A man in white jeans, a black turtleneck, and a glittery vest comes on stage to sing a song in Chinese. The fog machine shrouds the stage with mist. Strobe lights pulse. The crowd goes wild and starts buying him drinks to chug – I somehow get roped into chugging a beer with him. Everyone likes to see the foreigner drink.

 

Five random men are chosen from the crowd. It's a contest to see who can tear the most Japanese flags the fastest. The bartender starts doing a fire-breathing thing with some alcohol. People start burning Japanese flags. There is more chanting. I am "strongly encouraged" to chug another beer with the owner of the club.

 

The energy in the club was incredible. I can't even describe how entertaining it was to witness this awesome display of patriotism and celebration. It is moments and nights like this one where I can't believe how blessed I am to be experiencing life in another country.

 

I left the club laughing and saying, "I freaking love China!"

Moon Cake Roulette

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival! Today is National Day in China. There is a week long break from school and the village is bustling with activity. People have been launching fireworks non-stop since 7 am.

 

This is not an exaggeration. I've timed it.

 

The longest stretch of time that I couldn't hear fireworks so far today has been 22 minutes. And while I applaud this display of enthusiastic patriotism, I fear that I will never understand the point of launching fireworks during the day. You can't see them!?!?! Also, the random explosions scare the crap out of me.

 

I'll just add this to the list of things that will forever baffle me about China.

 

Besides the time off work, the coolest part of this holiday is the abundance of (mostly) delicious moon cakes – basically a little round pastry consisting of a pie-crust like exterior and some type of mystery filling.

 

I was gifted an assorted box by my school, and several random moon cakes from my students. Most of them are delicious, however, there have been a few malevolent surprises.

 

There is nothing more terrifying than the first bite into a moon cake.

 

Really. You don't know if you're going to get something delicious and fruity or something horrifying and unidentifiable. I call it "moon cake roulette"…

 

So far my luck has been decent. I've only needed to spit out a few bites. Thankfully my students realize that foreigners are partial to the more non-traditional flavors (think fruit and chocolate) as opposed to some of the fermented bean paste and unidentifiable substance filled cakes.

 

I have about 12 cakes left to try. Wish me luck.

The Spice Girls Concert

Have you ever done that thing where you forget that you have your iPod in and other people can hear you so you sing out loud and embarrass yourself?

 

I did that today. (Actually I do that a lot). And while I very much enjoy singing, I do not have a particular talent for it.  Tone-deaf is the word you're looking for.

 

Have I also mentioned that people here stare at me when I walk down the street? Singing aloud in English really doesn't help me blend on the streets of the village.

 

Yeah.

 

So I'm walking down the street singing 2 Become 1 by the Spice Girls and I'm overheard by a group of students. Great!

 

"Julie! You sing beautiful! What a lovely song!" "Yes! So beautiful! Like you!" "Please sing a song in class!"

 

Apparently I'm unable to resist the pleading of adorable Chinese teenagers who worship me.

And that's the story of how I ended up singing Spice Girls a cappella in front of fifty students.

The Weekend Has Been Cancelled (Riots and Protests Update)

This is just a brief update about the protests and riots I wrote about in my last post.

Right now I'm sitting at my window watching the protesters march down the street. It's all very organized and civil here… the police are directing traffic and there looks to be only a couple thousand people in the demonstration. It actually seems a bit anti-climactic.

 

The interesting thing is, even though it's Saturday, school is in session. The government doesn't want the kids participating in the demonstrations, so they decided to hold classes. School will also be held on Sunday.  As a foreign teacher, I'm exempt, but all of the regular teachers must skip their weekend and hold class. Which sucks for them… it doesn't appear that the weekend has been rescheduled, just cancelled. School resumes as usual on Monday.

Can you imagine how pissed students and teachers would be in the USA if the government just decided to randomly tack on a few extra days of school whenever they felt like it?

Riots and Protests.

In case you live under a rock or the American news outlets are still too busy talking about Kate Middleton's topless photos to report actual news, there has been some pretty intense anti-Japanese protesting and rioting going on in China these past few days.

 

The protests turned riots began due to a dispute about some tiny, uninhabited islands in the East China Sea. When Japan purchased the islands from a private owner last week, the Chinese got pissed. Apparently the area is thought to be rich in oil deposits. The ownership of these islands has been disputed for quite some time, but not much has been done about it because China and Japan do a great deal of commerce.

 

All over China Japanese owned businesses and Japanese branded items (like Toyota), and Japanese restaurants have been boycotted, mobbed, and even burned down. Nothing says, "'Those islands are ours!' like burning down a Toyota dealership." I've noticed some anti-Japanese sentiment (left over from WW2) since I've moved to China but not like this. Thankfully, I have been isolated from the protesting and rioting here in the village, but I have seen some of the effects.

 

Today, some of my more charming students decided that they were going to create tiny Japanese flags and stick them to the backs of their friends to make fun of them. Lovely. The biggest insult you can think of today is to call your friend Japanese.

 

It's best for me as a foreigner to just play dumb and stay out of it, but it's a bizarre thing to witness.

Ganbei! It's Teacher's Day!

China is way into celebrating frivolous holidays. Women's Day. Children's Day. Teachers Day. Not that women and children and teachers are unimportant, I just think that having a whole day set aside to celebrate something that we should be appreciating every day is pointless.

 

Regardless, Teacher's Day in the village was commemorated with an all school meeting followed by a huge banquet.

 

The meeting would have been boring, even If I could have understood what was going on. But I couldn't. So I sat respectfully in the audience with the other foreign teachers for an hour and a half listening to people I'd never seen before give speeches in Chinese, applauding politely with the crowd at random intervals.

 

After that we headed to the banquet. Every table was served a ton of food and as much beer and baiju as you could drink. As I'm not one to turn down free alcohol, I poured myself a beer.

 

Before I noticed that I was the only woman drinking something other than hot water. Oops. I guess that it's just the younger generation of Chinese women that drink in public. So I figured I'd discretely sip a few beers and escape the baiju fueled party that the men were having.

 

Chinese people love to drink. It's actually quite ritualistic. You fill up small shot-glass sized glasses full of beer, toast with somebody, down your glass, and then repeat with EVERYBODY within a 5-mile radius. Ganbei! Cheers!

 

Here's the thing. When you're drinking beer out of little tiny cups, it can be difficult to keep track of how much you are drinking. And trust me, little shot glasses full of beer add up quickly.

 

Not to mention that it's considered horribly rude to refuse a toast.

 

So I toasted. With the principal of my school. With the principal of the sister school. With the guy that founded the schools. With everyone at my table.

 

No problem. I figure the first round of toasting was the equivalent of one beer.

 

However, the table next to ours, a table of all men, was toasting with baiju instead of beer. Baiju aka strong wine, is the equivalent of drinking floor cleaner, and it's really strong. So this table was getting pretty rowdy.

 

A few of the men at that table decided that me drinking beer was amusing and thought it would be fun for me to start chugging beer like the men. I was brought a slightly larger glass and began to chug beers with the gym teacher. THE GYM TEACHER. Who is a big guy. Tall and muscular. I think the first glass was supposed to be a joke… but I chugged it in one gulp… and that started a bit of a competition.

 

According to Sky (my Chinese math teacher friend) my ability to chug a beer is "very cool". I'm even more of a celebrity than I was before.

 

Thankfully I was able to bow out gracefully when the gym teacher wanted to switch to chugging 40 oz bottles of beer. The other foreign teachers took over the drinking competition, and I was able to leave the meal mostly sober with my dignity in tact.

 

Plus I got a free Slanket (a blanket with sleeves) and 200 RNB gift card to the supermarket as a bonus. It turned out to be a highly successful and entertaining evening.

Cuddling Giant Pandas in Chengdu

The motivation behind visiting Chengdu this summer was to get a chance to check out the Giant Pandas. I love Pandas. They are precious.

 

The thing about Pandas is – they are just as dumb as they are adorable. And they are really freaking adorable. Sadly, this also means that they are dreadfully stupid and dying off pretty quickly. Enter the Giant Panda Research and Breeding Center.

 

Because Pandas are just so cute, humans can't let them die. There's also probably some residual guilt about destroying their natural habitat and thousands of acres of their natural food source and a tiny bit of concern about how their extinction would disrupt the ecosystem. But mostly they are just really, really cute.

 

Thus, for a $200 "donation" to support the center and its work, you can cuddle a Giant Panda. For about three minutes they plop a baby panda that's high out of it's mind on your lap so you can cuddle it and get some of the most epic photos ever, while the handlers distract the Panda with a little bamboo stick covered in honey.

 

It was worth every cent. While this was undoubtedly the most expensive thing I did this summer, it was awesome.

Spice Up Your Life

After Kunming, we headed off to Chengdu via an 18 hour train ride. Surprisingly enough, the train was quite pleasant. When we got to Chengdu, we were starving so we set off in search of food.

 

No trip to Sichuan province is complete without at least one hot pot experience.

 

Hot pot is kind of like it sounds. There's a big pot in the middle of the table filled with boiling broth infused with spices. A lot of very spicy spices. At least in Sichuan. I've had hot pot before, but never this spicy. And if I think something is spicy, it's actually spicy - none of that fake out crap at restaurants where they warn you it's spicy, and you get all excited, and then it turns out they consider a few shakes of black pepper spicy. So basically, what you do is order a bunch of raw food, toss it in the pot, wait for it to cook, the fish it out of the pot and eat it. I think it's kind of fun because it's an activity and a meal all at the same time.

 

A group of people from our hostel decided to go to Fat Mama's Hot Pot, a recommended restaurant nearby.

 

When we got there, there was no English or picture menu… So Mallory and I headed off into the kitchen to order for our table of 8. They literally let us go through their refrigerators to point to the items we wanted… The poor guys that were preparing the food were looking at us like we were insane. Two blonde laowai poking around a random kitchen in China.

 

I picked out some lotus root, which I love, and I managed to get all the others addicted to it. Towards the end of the meal, it was an all out battle to see who could find the last bits of lotus root in the pot.

 

It was delicious. If you ever get the chance, eat Sichuan Hot Pot.

Stone Forest Scandals

The Stone Forest is pretty much what it sounds like. A big forest… but instead of trees, it has a bunch of really tall stones. While that description leaves something to be desired, it's actually really cool. A few hours outside of Kunming, in Yunnan Province, the stone forest is set up a bit like a national park, so basically you can just wander around, have a picnic, do some hiking, enjoy the weather, etc.

 

As soon as you walk into the park you are accosted by little old Chinese women offering to dress you in ancient traditional costumes and take your pictures in front of the stones.

 

Normally I avoid this type of activity as it's a good way to get ripped off, but the costumes were really fun, and I was with someone who speaks really good Chinese so I figured it was a good opportunity to take some crazy photos. The other girls were down, so we had Mallory ask about prices. The woman said 10 RNB for each person (about $1.50 US) for three photos with the three of us in it. Cool.

 

We confirmed the price. 10 RNB each. For everything. Ok.

 

By the time we agreed, I was pretty much already dressed in the ridiculous costume, and seconds later the other girls were too. Of course we were then swarmed by Chinese people wanting to take pictures of us. 20 minutes and several thousand pictures later we took off the costumes, paid the women, and received the pictures. 3 happy customers.

 

Until… we go to leave. Surprise! The sweet little Chinese woman morphs into a monster. It was like watching the Incredible Hulk transform. She starts yelling at Mallory in Chinese. Of course the other girl and I are just super confused at this point – my Chinese sucks.

 

"MONEYYYYYY!! RWARRRRR!!!!" Hulk Smash. Of course she wanted more money. Now she's claiming there is a "costume fee." She wanted 10 more from each of us.

 

Uh huh. Sure. So we roll our eyes and try to walk away. This isn't our first Rodeo sweetheart. The Hulk then proceeds to throw a fit and grab Mallory and physically try to drag us back to her station. "MONEYYYYYY!! RWARRRRR!!!!"

 

The argument went on and the Hulk wouldn't let go of Mal.  Tourists were taking pictures of the confrontation. More arguing in Chinese. Now the Hulk only wanted 5 RNB each.

 

Great. So now we're bargaining on how much we're getting ripped off for. Ohhh China. You almost had me fooled. We actually were about to pay the 10 kwai just so we could go, but then the lady lowered it to 5 and changed the game.

 

So we conference amongst ourselves. We really didn't want to pay the extra money. It was the principle of the thing.

 

Finally we just decided we were going to ignore the women and hopefully they would go away. After about two minutes of them listening to our discussion, in English, on what we were going to do that evening when we got back to the hostel, the Hulk transformed back into Bruce Banner, became rational, and walked away, realizing we weren't going to pay.

 

We walked away without getting ripped off. But it was a good way to get the adrenaline pumping.

 

Here's what you should take away from this. If you are being hassled in China over money, just ignore them. Pay your fair price and walk away. It's like negotiating with terrorists. Don't do it.

The Sun is Setting!!! Time to Go to the Beach???

After Guangzhou and the Macau gambling marathon, a nice relaxing week at the beach was just what I needed, so Mallory and I took a short flight to Sanya, a resort city on Hainan Island, known as China's Hawaii.

 

I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it was nothing like I thought it would be… Sanya is really difficult to describe. It's basically just another Chinese city. But it also happens to have a few nice beaches.

 

To me, most beaches/ resort towns pretty much blend together. I think I was expecting the usual… Nice hotels, restaurants, and bars along the water. Women in bikinis relaxing in lounge chairs or under umbrellas on the beach. Kids building sand castles. People selling islandy crafts and shell necklaces. That type of thing.

 

And Sanya had that. But it was all VERY Chinese. I don't know why I was surprised. I was still in China after all.

 

How can a beach be Chinese? Easy. First of all, during the day, when the sun was out, the beach was empty. Sure there were a few people out and about, but not many. As soon as the sun started to set, out came the masses.

 

In general, Chinese people are very concerned about getting tan. They do NOT want dark skin, thus sunshine is avoided, ipso facto, you go to the beach at dark. Problem solved. Mallory got pretty sunburned. The Chinese people were HORRIFIED. Random people would walk by her and exclaim, "What did you do to your skin!?!?!?!?"

 

Second, Chinese people love KTV or karaoke. Love it. So why not set it up on the beach. A few tables and chairs, a flat screen T.V., and a few microphones, and you've got KTV on the beach. ON THE BEACH. In the sand. Not at a bar along the boardwalk (although I did see a couple of those). On the beach.

 

Finally, all the restaurants along the beach were still straight up Chinese. In the US, beach restaurants have a certain vibe… Most tend to be kind of laid back. The furniture changes, the décor becomes a bit more casual. In Sanya, it felt like typically Chinese restaurants were just plopped on the beach… No accommodations for being outdoors or along a boardwalk. I quite liked it.

 

Also a funny side note. Sanya is the vacation destination for a lot of Russians. I guess I look somewhat Russian… so instead of shopkeepers yelling English words out a me, they where yelling Russian… or handing me a Russian menu at restaurants. So not helpful – my Russian is even worse than my Chinese.

 

But all in all, Sanya was pretty cool. I got to go SCUBA diving, get a tan, meet a bunch of awesome people, and have a fresh seafood dinner on the boardwalk. The beaches have nothing on Florida beaches, but the cultural experience made it totally worth the visit. And lounging on the beach is always awesome

Macau. Always a Good Idea.

Macau is a two hour bus ride away from Guangzhou. Sounds perfect for a day trip right?  First bus there leaves at 7:30 am, last bus back leaves at 10 pm. Plenty of time for sight seeing and gambling.

 

Ummm… kind of. We got up early, hopped the bus to Macau, made it there by 10 am. No problems.

 

Then we saw the line to go through customs. It took us two hours to leave China and another hour and a half to get into Macau. Totally didn't factor that into our gambling time.

 

After a delicious Portuguese lunch (Macau used to be a Portuguese colony), several free drinks, and a few hours on the slots at the Wynn we came up with a "brilliant" idea.

 

"Let's stay up all night and catch the 7 am bus back to Guangzhou tomorrow so we don't have to deal with the long customs line!"

 

Genius.

 

The drinks were free. The slot machines were paying and talked to you in Chinese. You're gambling with either Hong Kong dollars or Macau dollars so you really have no idea what you are spending.  It was fantastic.

 

Side note: I found a new favorite slot machine. It is a Chinese vampire game… it gives you lots of free spins and it talks to you in Chinese – Wo shi xi xue gui!!! (I am a vampire) Muahhhh hhaaaahh hahhhha hhahah…. It was hysterical. Probably one of those things where you had to be there though.

 

Our idea seemed inspired until about 4 am. Then the exhaustion set in. We had been awake almost 24 hours. The casinos are ENORMOUS. We probably walked over twenty miles trekking from casino to casino. Just walking through the entire Venetian is a good mile or two.

 

We managed to haul ourselves back through customs – which only took about 15 minutes this time – and back to Guangzhou. After a shower and a 6 hour "nap" we managed to drag ourselves out of the hostel for dinner and shopping. For me, recovering from a long night of partying is the equivalent of recovering from minor surgery.

 

I was exhausted for the next couple of days, but it was totally worth it. Bottom line: Macau – always a good idea.