The Countryside

Today was the first day back from vacation, so I thought that I'd ask the kids what they did during their holiday.

 

"I went to the countryside" – was the overwhelming response. Even most of the adults I asked said they did this.

 

But what exactly happens in the countryside? I HAVE NO IDEA. I literally could not get anyone to expand on what going to the countryside means.

 

Do you visit your family there? Is there some sort of resort or orchard? Are there just thousands of Chinese people standing around in an enormous field? What happens in this mysterious "countryside"?

 

Nobody could tell me. Or maybe nobody was allowed to tell me.

 

The only conclusion I can make is that it is clearly a secret. Foreigners must never learn what happens there.

A Foreigners Guide To Living in China.

I was asked to write an article about living in China by my school for a country wide competition… Here's my submission:

 

China is an amazing place. It is without a doubt one of the coolest, most interesting, and historically fascinating countries on earth. I could go on and on with the superlatives, but I'll leave it up to you to come up with your own way of describing China – everyone's experience is different.

 

That being said, life in China is markedly different from life in the USA. Everyday things like going to the supermarket, eating dinner, and paying for your cell phone can become totally incomprehensible and overwhelming if you don't know what to expect.

 

Here are a few helpful tips that will ease your transition into life here.

 

You will be a celebrity – embrace it. If you resemble anything but a native Chinese person, get ready to stand out. If you happen to be blonde haired and blue eyed like myself the difference is even more evident.

 

Everyone will acknowledge you wherever you go. Children will point and laugh. Grown men will say "Hello!" and then run away giggling when you say hello back. People will be curious as to what you are ordering for dinner or buying at the supermarket. They will stare. I love it, but it's been known to annoy some.

 

People will also take your picture. This may be done blatantly or discretely depending on the personality of the photographer. The brave people will ask for a photo with you! I've posed for family portraits and been asked to hold babies and pets. What people are doing with these pictures I have yet to discover. If you find out, let me know.

 

You will know you have gotten used to your fame and to life in China when you begin to stare at the foreign tourists just as much as the locals do.

 

Forget everything you know about Chinese food. Real Chinese food is even better than you can imagine. Real Chinese food varies from city to city, but it is always delicious. As a foreigner, you won't recognize 95% of the things you eat, but don't let that stop you from shoveling it in as fast as your chopsticks can go. Chinese chefs can turn simple things like cucumbers, tomatoes, and eggs into a delicious meal. And eating out is much cheaper and easier than attempting to cook for yourself. Come ready to eat.

 

Make Chinese friends. Chinese friends are the best. Seriously. They are kind, loyal, and amazingly helpful. They will keep you from making any serious cultural faux pas and help you learn about real Chinese culture. My favorite memories of China so far are of chilling with my amazing new friends.

 

It's also nice to have someone that won't get offended and will only laugh at you a little bit when you ask about something strange or obvious.

 

Come prepared to travel. China is a massive country with a million awesome things to see. There's no better way to get to know the locals than by bonding on an eighteen-hour train ride. Each province has it's own unique food, fascinating history, and wonderful people to discover.

 

I've climbed the Great Wall and hiked through the Stone Forest. I've eaten fried scorpions in Beijing and Hot Pot in Chengdu. I've seen the Impressions West Lake performance and the Sichuan Opera. I've visited thousand year old water villages. I've cuddled a Giant Panda. I've met wonderful people and made great friends in each city I visited.

 

You could spend a year traveling from place to place and still not be able to experience all that China has to offer.

 

Enjoy every second of your time here. It's impossible to summarize China in any neat way – it's so enormous and diverse and your experiences will vary from day to day and city to city. I'll sum it up by saying – If you are thinking about coming to China; do it! You won't regret it for a second.

I Freaking Love China!

I was going to have a quiet Monday evening. So how did I end up in 0513, the only nightclub in the village, being forced to chug beer as hundreds of people belt out the Chinese national anthem?

 

Excellent question. Things really escalated quickly.

 

What started out as a leisurely stroll around the village with my friend Sky turned into a rowdy National Day celebration at 0513… There are really no words that can accurately depict the events of that fateful eve.

 

It still seems quite surreal.

 

I cooked myself dinner. I went for a walk with Sky. We bought some pomegranates. We stopped to eat our pomegranates and watch one of the best firework displays I've ever seen. We got dragged to the club by a stampede of celebrants wanting to hang with the laowai.

 

I enter the nightclub via the usual red carpet. At the end of the red carpet is a HUGE photo of Chairman Mao that you must cross to get in. Every inch of the club is covered with a Chinese flag or a poster declaring, "The Diaoyu Islands belong to China!" The employees are sporting China owns the Diaoyu Islands shirts.

 

There was a lull in the chaos as we settled into the club. I played dice games with some friends. I danced to Flo Rida. I sipped a beer.

 

The lights go out. Three club girls march out in slutty military uniforms and proceed to do a provocative dance to the Chinese national anthem. The crowd starts getting pumped. A man in white jeans, a black turtleneck, and a glittery vest comes on stage to sing a song in Chinese. The fog machine shrouds the stage with mist. Strobe lights pulse. The crowd goes wild and starts buying him drinks to chug – I somehow get roped into chugging a beer with him. Everyone likes to see the foreigner drink.

 

Five random men are chosen from the crowd. It's a contest to see who can tear the most Japanese flags the fastest. The bartender starts doing a fire-breathing thing with some alcohol. People start burning Japanese flags. There is more chanting. I am "strongly encouraged" to chug another beer with the owner of the club.

 

The energy in the club was incredible. I can't even describe how entertaining it was to witness this awesome display of patriotism and celebration. It is moments and nights like this one where I can't believe how blessed I am to be experiencing life in another country.

 

I left the club laughing and saying, "I freaking love China!"

Moon Cake Roulette

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival! Today is National Day in China. There is a week long break from school and the village is bustling with activity. People have been launching fireworks non-stop since 7 am.

 

This is not an exaggeration. I've timed it.

 

The longest stretch of time that I couldn't hear fireworks so far today has been 22 minutes. And while I applaud this display of enthusiastic patriotism, I fear that I will never understand the point of launching fireworks during the day. You can't see them!?!?! Also, the random explosions scare the crap out of me.

 

I'll just add this to the list of things that will forever baffle me about China.

 

Besides the time off work, the coolest part of this holiday is the abundance of (mostly) delicious moon cakes – basically a little round pastry consisting of a pie-crust like exterior and some type of mystery filling.

 

I was gifted an assorted box by my school, and several random moon cakes from my students. Most of them are delicious, however, there have been a few malevolent surprises.

 

There is nothing more terrifying than the first bite into a moon cake.

 

Really. You don't know if you're going to get something delicious and fruity or something horrifying and unidentifiable. I call it "moon cake roulette"…

 

So far my luck has been decent. I've only needed to spit out a few bites. Thankfully my students realize that foreigners are partial to the more non-traditional flavors (think fruit and chocolate) as opposed to some of the fermented bean paste and unidentifiable substance filled cakes.

 

I have about 12 cakes left to try. Wish me luck.

The Spice Girls Concert

Have you ever done that thing where you forget that you have your iPod in and other people can hear you so you sing out loud and embarrass yourself?

 

I did that today. (Actually I do that a lot). And while I very much enjoy singing, I do not have a particular talent for it.  Tone-deaf is the word you're looking for.

 

Have I also mentioned that people here stare at me when I walk down the street? Singing aloud in English really doesn't help me blend on the streets of the village.

 

Yeah.

 

So I'm walking down the street singing 2 Become 1 by the Spice Girls and I'm overheard by a group of students. Great!

 

"Julie! You sing beautiful! What a lovely song!" "Yes! So beautiful! Like you!" "Please sing a song in class!"

 

Apparently I'm unable to resist the pleading of adorable Chinese teenagers who worship me.

And that's the story of how I ended up singing Spice Girls a cappella in front of fifty students.

The Weekend Has Been Cancelled (Riots and Protests Update)

This is just a brief update about the protests and riots I wrote about in my last post.

Right now I'm sitting at my window watching the protesters march down the street. It's all very organized and civil here… the police are directing traffic and there looks to be only a couple thousand people in the demonstration. It actually seems a bit anti-climactic.

 

The interesting thing is, even though it's Saturday, school is in session. The government doesn't want the kids participating in the demonstrations, so they decided to hold classes. School will also be held on Sunday.  As a foreign teacher, I'm exempt, but all of the regular teachers must skip their weekend and hold class. Which sucks for them… it doesn't appear that the weekend has been rescheduled, just cancelled. School resumes as usual on Monday.

Can you imagine how pissed students and teachers would be in the USA if the government just decided to randomly tack on a few extra days of school whenever they felt like it?

Riots and Protests.

In case you live under a rock or the American news outlets are still too busy talking about Kate Middleton's topless photos to report actual news, there has been some pretty intense anti-Japanese protesting and rioting going on in China these past few days.

 

The protests turned riots began due to a dispute about some tiny, uninhabited islands in the East China Sea. When Japan purchased the islands from a private owner last week, the Chinese got pissed. Apparently the area is thought to be rich in oil deposits. The ownership of these islands has been disputed for quite some time, but not much has been done about it because China and Japan do a great deal of commerce.

 

All over China Japanese owned businesses and Japanese branded items (like Toyota), and Japanese restaurants have been boycotted, mobbed, and even burned down. Nothing says, "'Those islands are ours!' like burning down a Toyota dealership." I've noticed some anti-Japanese sentiment (left over from WW2) since I've moved to China but not like this. Thankfully, I have been isolated from the protesting and rioting here in the village, but I have seen some of the effects.

 

Today, some of my more charming students decided that they were going to create tiny Japanese flags and stick them to the backs of their friends to make fun of them. Lovely. The biggest insult you can think of today is to call your friend Japanese.

 

It's best for me as a foreigner to just play dumb and stay out of it, but it's a bizarre thing to witness.